Cleaning with the Kiddos: A Rite of Passage

I’m busy. I am a mom, a partner, a full-time manager, a priest, and a grad student. Actually, I’m very busy. When I first sat down to write today, I thought I’d be writing about that—about how being busy means it is more important than ever to seek balance in your relationships, and about how finding time for self-care is necessary to decrease and alleviate burnout.

And then I got frustrated with the younger two children.

I’ve been telling them to clean their rooms for months, and because I am busy, I’ve let them slide with the occasion load of laundry leaving their rooms and habitual round-up of dishes. Yesterday, I decided to take the time to “Mommy clean” their rooms. This is usually met with tears and sadness. “Mommy clean” means I go in with garbage bags and throw away anything that is gross, broken, or old and without sentimental value.

Timmy was a trooper. I had to reassure him several times that he was not in trouble, but for the first time, he didn’t lose his cool and have an emotional breakdown. He had a couple moments of sadness, but we were able to talk through it and finish the task together. I am so proud of how far he has come!

In Jessica’s room, my goal was mostly to get rid of all the clothes that are too small to make room—and then I opened her closet. Piled high with blankets and stuffed animals, boxes and bags, random shoes and clothes and who knows what else, her closet looked like an entropy-bomb went off inside. We decided we needed to clean the closet.

Over the next two hours, we pulled everything out and sorted it. We filled eight garbage bags full of trash and donations. This simple purge of her room became a right of passage. Jessica made some choices as she was looking through her life, through everything she owns, and began to throw away the little girl that she once was. She threw away broken crayons, old drawings, shoes, games, and her Barbies. I sat with her as we remembered all the little memories that lived in each of those old things and made room for who she is to become.

The Importance of Self-Understanding and Introspection

Self-knowledge is crucial for working magic. It simply is. In order to offer magical services or manifest a magical working, we must know where our strengths and weaknesses lie. Introspection is one of the main avenues for learning about ourselves. It is the hindsight with which we analyze our life experiences that aid us in become better versions of ourselves, teaching us to be make decisions about what is possible for us to accomplish now and what work we need to do in order to make ourselves ready to accomplish our goals. In terms of psychology, the degree to which we know ourselves is termed “personal intelligence.” According to the Psychologist, John D. Mayer, who co-developed the theory of emotional intelligence, it is equally as important for us to know ourselves as it is for us to know others. People who know themselves well are better able to acknowledge their own limitations and know when to say when to avoid getting in over their heads. (Mayer Know Thyself) 

 As a society, we are a busy folk. We tend to be always “on the go,” with little time built into our schedules for taking a look at our own thoughts, our feelings, our behaviors, and the outcomes of our actions to truly learn from our everyday experiences. Having a deeper understanding of ourselves is paramount to opening ourselves to the growth and increase in abilities that comes from learning from those experiences. My plan of action for increasing self-knowledge is to start by being cognizant of my everyday “mundane” experiences. I have taken a few courses through my employer about self-introspection as a means of leadership development, and it is clear to me that in order for us to operate in a magical realm in which our actions have effect on not just our own lives but potentially the lives of many others, we have a responsibility to be certain of our own abilities and an ethical responsibility to only undertake those actions for which we are well-suited. I plan to accomplish this goal through routine journaling and continued professional development. In addition, I plan to assess any magical workings I do for success/failure and seek instruction from those ahead of me on the path whenever possible.

Mayer, John D. PhD. “Know Thyself.” Psychology Today. 11 March 2014. Web. Retrieved 02 May 2014 from

Expectation

I lie next to expectation

In comfortless stagnation

Thinking and sinking deeper inside

To the place where I hide

My most dangerous fears

I give in and cry the litany of tears

Each holding pieces of heart

Character flaws and body parts

My unfulfilled and broken dreams

My rapidly sinking self-esteem

Until empty I lie her and stare at the ceiling

And wonder if anything you might be feeling

Is triggered by happiness or warmth or desire

And I stand here alone at our together fire

Waiting.

Offering to Persephone/Kore and the Blessing of the Tools

At this time in Ancient Greece, they celebrate Anthesphoria, the Festival of Flowers. It is now that Persephone returns from the Underworld to walk with her mother, Demeter, Goddess of Grain and the Earth’s Fertility. She is known in the Middle World as the Kore, the Maiden of the Spring Time, and as she walks among us, green begins to appear once more upon the land at each place where her feet have touched the ground. It is only after her return that Demeter will allow the sleeping greenery to come to full wakefulness.

Call to Kore

Kore, Daughter of the Sky Father, Zeus and the Earth Goddess of Growing Things, Demeter; Beloved Queen of the Underworld! The time is come for you to resume your reign as Maiden of the Spring! The world has wept and all went cold and barren in your time of absence. You return now, to your sacred gardens, reminding us that loss is inevitable, but sorrow is temporary. As you walk upon the earth once more and flowers fall from your feet, we are reminded that all things have cycles—life and death and rebirth are an integral piece of order in the cosmos. The time of rebirth has come!

Beloved Kore, Mighty Queen! Accept our offerings! Esto!” (Offer wine)

Blessing of the Tools

During this awakening of the Earth, we see the flowers peeking their heads bravely above the ground, greeting our Lady of the Spring as she passes by. These first flowers awakened by the magic of the Goddess are now used to spread that magic to the gardens ‘round our hearths. By Kore’s charge, we place these flowers upon the tools of the trade.  We water them with the blessings of the Kindreds, given to us in exchange for our piety and right action. May they be blessed by her hands. May they be blessed by her mother’s hands. May they bless the hands that hold them. May the work completed through these tools come to full fruition in their time.

So say we all!

Working to Benefit the Folk Through the Core Order of Ritual

1. As stewards of the Land and the Folk, it is desirous that our work provide real benefit to the community we serve. The needs of the Folk and the land are simple: health of body, wealth of materials, and wisdom/intelligence. The Core Order of Ritual provides an avenue for the Folk to commune with the Kindreds and obtain the blessings they hold for us.  (Corrigan Intentions)

Our Core Order serves the people through the building and maintaining of relationships with the Powers. It provides a means for offering our gifts to the Kindreds and a means for receiving the Blessings they have for us in return. As Celebrants of the Core Order, it is our duty to channel the gifts through the gates to the Kindreds, harness the blessings they give in return and transform them into a usable form for the Folk. This is achieved through the Return Flow portion of the rite in which we imbibe the waters we have set aside with the Blessings of the Kindreds. The Blessings are first communicated to us through the taking of an omen using whatever chosen form of divination the practitioner sees fit (based merely on preference and/or familiarity). The questions asked may range anywhere from asking for healing and asking for information and clarification, when indicated to a simple, open-ended, “what blessings do you offer to us in return?” This continued reciprocity, over time, serves to build and maintain relationships between the Kindreds and the Folk.

The reaffirming of shared beliefs may seem vague at first, as ADF is an orthopraxic faith, based on right action, as opposed to being orthodoxic, right belief. As ADF does not require the Folk to even believe the Kindreds are real, sentient beings, the reaffirming of shared belief is far-fetched. However, we have all agreed that the “right action” is to give to the Spirits, to observe the Eight Neopagan High Days following our ritual format, and to be open to receive from them in return. We agree that the universe may be built around a sacred center consisting of three divisions that tie us to the realms of the Land, Sea and Sky and whatever beings happen to be in them.

Our Core Order is centered on reestablishing the Cosmic Order. We have come to agree that the Center is established in a tripartite manner, with three distinct realms, accessed by three distinct gates, and giving us a direct connection to three categories of Beings. The Upper gate through the Fire connects us to the Gods, the Midrealm gate through the Tree connects us to the Noble kin, and the Lower gate through the Well connects us to the Ancestors, though there are variations of this section of ritual and Fire is the only required element. When we reestablish the cosmic order, we further tie ourselves into the creation myths of the Indo-European peoples whose myth cycles describe the ordering of the rampant chaos into a concise, cohesive whole in which life is able to thrive. Feeding this cosmic order provides stability and order to the lives of the participants.

In his article, “Elements of Ritual Composition,” Todd Covert equates enthusiasm to energy. We refer to the “energy of ritual” in many of our publications; it is the moveable form of our intentions and gifts that we give to the Kindreds and the gift they give to us in return. However, the term energy, Covert suggests, may be replaced with the “sturdy” word of Greek origin, enthusiasm. The original definition was not only the “positive feeling toward something” that we know it as today, but also embodied the “state of inspiration that has flowed into a person from the divine realm” (Covert Elements).  Thus, to be enthused was to be infused with the divine. Enthusiasm, then, is achieved by our Core Order during the Return Flow when the energy gifts given to us by the Kindreds are given to the Folk through the Waters, infusing the Folk with the powers of the divine.  In other words, our Core Order builds enthusiasm within the folk by providing a means for affecting change within the participants and penetrating beyond the intellectual plane of their psyches to the emotional and “uncanny” places (psychic, or magical) where the Folk will feel as though they have felt the presence of the Kindreds in a memorable and useful way. (Covert Elements)

Our Core Order has evolved over these few decades into a format that serves the folk not only through mechanical means, but also meets their needs of body, mind and spirit. It is through our practices that we have made and kept connections between the Folk and the Kindreds, ordered the cosmos to maintain balance, and brought the Elder Ways into our modern society. These gifts, perhaps less acknowledged than they should be, are an ongoing part of Our Druidry and the underlying foundation that will continue to carry ADF into the future.

Together We Will Weather all the Storms

Together We Will Weather all the Storms

Capo III

A                                  E

I’m no good at writing love songs

D                     A
I’m too used to sharing pain

Too used to broken promises

And efforts spent in vain

But my pen can’t leave this paper

As I write what’s in my heart

And send these words across the miles

To find you where you are

I’ll wrap you up in words of love

Of comfort for your tears

I’ll hold you close and heal those wounds

You’ve gathered through the years

You’ll find the strength to carry on

The work you’re meant to do

As you and I combine our paths

We’re stronger when we’re two

            Bm                              A

You’ve been alone and lonely
Bm                                          A
Suffered through heartache and pain
Bm                                          A
You’ve grown to be the man before me
Bm                                         E
Laughing and smiling in the rain

A                                                      G
Hold me in your arms and we can weather all the storms
D                                             A
Raging ‘round your heart together
(A)                                                       G                             D
I’ll be here with you when there is nothing left to do but wait—

     F                         G                      A             G         D         A
And we’ll wait here in our calm within the storm

There’s a different kind of yearning

A softened lover’s grace

That longs to see your gentle smile

And waits for your embrace
There’s a burning deep inside that glows
and smolders in the dark
Igniting us to blazing every time
We make a spark

The distance seems cold and lonely

With so much to do on our own

We’ve grown in love and trust on our journeys

10,000 Tuesdays soon in our own home

I know it can be hard when I’m so far from where you are

But we’re under the same stars together
And deep within the night when you feel lost without the light
Just wait—

I’ll soon be on my way back to your arms

A
Alone we’ve grown
E
As one we’ll soar
D
Alone we’ve hurt
A
As one we’ll heal
A
Alone we’ve cried
E
As one we’ll try
Bm                                               E
To heal our memories with our song

Make Fire with me, my love, as we embrace the love above—

The love that’s streaming down upon us

And deep within your soul when hear my voice you’ll know I’m yours—

            F                      G                     A          G         D

And together we will weather all the storms
    F                        G                     A                G         D

Together we will weather all the storms

    F                       G                       A
Together we will weather all the storms

Winter Solstice Vigil: A Song for the Earth Mother and the Return of the Sun

As the darkness descends upon the land
and all is blanketed in night
As the silence consumes the passing year
and all that was is left behind

Feel the Earth beneath your feet
(Though she sleeps, though she sleeps)
Feel her breath upon your cheeks
(Though she sleeps beneath your feet)

On this night we keep the fires burning bright
The longest night of all the year
We give our thanks for all the blessings we have known
And pray the sun will reappear

The Mother sleeps and all is cold
(The Mother sleeps and all is cold)
The darkness yields and there behold!

Behold, Behold! The Return of the Light!
Behold, Behold! The triumph o’er the night!
Behold, Behold! The darkness fades away!
Behold, a brand new day!

Drop Box Recording