Spring Equinox: Athesphoria

Well, I did it. I DIC-ed my first ADF rite with the Cranes. This was also our first EVER Hellenic rite. When I was first approached about doing a Hellenic rite, I was assuming it would be more of a "them humoring me" kind of affair. What actually happened has blown me away. Back story: I was a solitary for a long time, surrounded by people who never took my faith seriously. I am used to being humored when it comes to things like dumping a portion of really good wine on the ground or the recycling Nazi-ism that is rampant in my home. I have very good people in my life, but they just don't understand. Not my Gods, not my high days, not my devotion. But they love me, so they humor me.

Spring Equinox planning began very shortly after Imbolc. I had already been working on the rite I was dong as a solitary, so when I was asked to do the High Day, I merely had to adapt for a group (harder than it sounds to go that way than to go from group to solitary!). From the beginning, everyone has been supportive of my efforts and done a lot to make this rite a success. When the girls decided to make ritual gowns, I was excited. I have never been one to wear any type of ritual clothing, though I have donned a few cloaks in my time when its cold, purely out of function. I was floored when things in my life once again went topsy-turvy and the girls made my dress for me. No, seriously. I showed up twice for fitting purposes, and never sewed a stitch. The dress? Absolutely beautiful. (There are some picture floating around, so I will see what I can snitch from someone who was at the rite. My camera was broken the night before the rite.)

So, after much personal drama and a mere hour of sleep, I showed up at the park, ready to go. The final count was 54 participants for this rite. 54! That's a lot of people to stand up in front of and profess your love to a Goddess! We had a few treasured guests from out of town who came all the way in and participated with offerings and songs, altar decorations and basic Hellenic flair. (Thanks for coming! It was awesome to have you among the rest of my beloved Kin for the day!)

The rite itself went fairly well. I will try not to over-analyze and go negative like I usually do when critiquing myself. I made a few mistakes, one fairly big one, but just kept going so no one would ever know. Hopefully, those who noticed didn't think that I meant for it to be that way, but realized that I was compensating for a bad ritual move! The praise composed by the other members was all very moving. I could tell how much thought and preparation went into the writing of their pieces.

What next? Well, the completion of this high day is the final piece to my Dedicant Program material. Once I insert my write-up of the rite, I am ready to submit. (Really? Can it be time already? Whew!) So many things about this rite have humbled my spirit and filled my heart with love. Watching everyone band together to make this a success was inspiring and encouraged me to do my best. Seeing all those happy faces when I got there and being able to perform the rite outside filled my spirit with joy. Most of all, calling on my patron and watching 54 people sing her praises and make her offerings was almost more than I could handle. I really felt that providing a place for the people to make offerings to Persephone was an offering in and of itself...and if I weren't Hellene, this probably would never ahve happened. I realize that, and it is humbling. I stood up there and watched everyone make offerings, listened to two people sing songs to her and did my very best not to cry. I am trying to feel pride for what I have done, but I had so much help and really had such a small part in the whole thing that I barely feel able to take credit for the success of this rite. All in all, it was amazing.

In conclusion, I have decided that it was time for our Grove to honor the Hellenic gods. We have done a great job of honoring all the members of the IE cultures so far, and this has been long due. I am hoping someone will write a Vedic or Baltic Rite that we can do as a Grove. What better way to learn and to grow than to be exposed to different ways of doing things? As long as we always pray with a good fire...

PS) We are never, ever doing Earth Mother, Blossom Lifter again, so don't ask.
PSS) I have to admit, I do like being spanked by a Norsewoman in a chiton... ;)

Dedicant Oath Recap

As I’ve said before, there have been two instances in my life in which I have made a vow, only one of those was public, until now. When I got married in 2001, I vowed to honor, love, cherish and be devoted to my husband. At that time, I finally understood the phrase: “this is the first day of the rest of your life.”

Tonight, I gave my final Dedicant Oath. Before the Druid Moon tonight, I felt that this oath, or Oath, was a formality of the way I live my life.

I was so wrong.

I still cannot describe to you all that I am experiencing right now, but I can tell you this: all of my spiritual life, all that I have poured into it, and all that I ever hoped to get out of it has been leading me up to this. This, all of this, is what I was meant to do. And now that it is done, I have no idea what to do next. The world is my oyster, so to speak.

Backing up a bit, we honored the Earth Mother today as our DotO for this Druid Moon. Four of us, including me, were inducted into the Grove as full members. My sisters were all around me today. They all took off a piece of jewelry for me to wear, and Anna even threw her cloak on me. My heart was full before we even began!

We were asked some questions before we entered into the sacred space. Once we were all upstairs, Mike did a guided two powers themed meditation. I don’t remember much of the words he used because I tranced out for a minute. I really needed that.

We honored the Earth Mother, and inducted the new members, including me. Yay! I am now an official part of the family. It’s good to be home with my brothers and sisters.

Before I actually gave my oath, I made some offerings to a few of the Kindred who were there for me, leading me, guiding me, and shaping me along my Dedicant journey. My journey really began several years ago when Athene first called me (you know, back when I “caught the pagan.” Be careful Laughter is a side effect!).

I gave thanks to Hestia, for always being there, even in the most mundane of tasks, to remind me that all little jobs are necessary. There is great strength in being the head of a household, and that strength can be passed along to those around you as you care for them. (Offered herbal mix)

I lit candles and thanked all three Kindred in turn for their guidance and assistance.

I gave thank to Apollo and the Muses for inspiration in music and words. I have grown and changed a lot through the music I have been given, and I am grateful for this outlet in my life. Many hard times were weathered with song. (Offered wine)

I gave thanks to Athene, whose initial work prepared me for what was to come. She taught me, first and foremost to control my emotions better. She gave me the patience to wait and gather information before making decisions. (Offered real pearl ring I got when I was 16 in Myrtle Beach)

And then I thanked Persephone, who taught me the merits of perseverance and acceptance. When life gets hard, when you are faced with an unexpected hardship, you have two choices: either you can wallow in the pits of Hades, or you can become the Queen of the Underworld. Persephone taught me how to overcome and rise above, to make the best out of any given situation, no matter the difficulty. (Offered Pomegranate necklace from Jerusalem)

I placed my hand on the sickle, but before I began to speak, Mike pressed my hand into the blade. Not in a painful way, but with enough force to let me know that I was doing something important. I could feel the blade against my hand for several minutes after it was gone. My flesh still remembers that feeling as I write this.

I took my Oath with Styx as witness. Just invoking her is a very powerful experience. When she is called forth, she comes and stands beside you immediately, listening intently to your every breath and intention as you speak. I fear I cannot even tell you the words I spoke. It was just me and my Kindred, a blade against my palm, and my entire life flashing before my eyes. I remember what I meant: that I shall follow the Elder paths, honor the Kindred with offerings from heart, hands and creative spirit, and steep myself in the knowledge and lore of the gods and those who have gone before me. I also intended to say that I plan on treading lightly and honoring the Earth Mother, though I think the first half of this rite, which was dedicated to the Earth Mother, said it all for me.

Omens?
Nature Spirits offer Sowilo, Victory/The Sun.
Ancestors offer Othala, Ancestral Property/Inheritance. Spiritual heritage.
Shining Ones offer Ehwaz, Horse/transportation. Also harmony/teamwork.
I have entered into a partnership with the Kindred, a binding life-long contract, and they are pleased. My future is bright, and I will not be moving forward from here alone. I have no need to ask whether or not my Oath was accepted. It was. And this is only the beginning.

I am glad I decided not to do this in a solitary rite. I understand better now the reasons they say witnessing an oath binds your Wyrdd together, because I absolutely felt more connected to those around me after it was over. Overall, I would say my Oath went rather well, and I couldn’t have asked for a better group of people with whom to share this experience (with the exception of adding Tanrinia and Seamus, who were sorely missed. I’ll have to tie my Wyrdd to them another day). ;) Thank you, everyone who was present for this, for making this one of the best experiences of my life.

And I found my note cards while I was cleaning up…right where I left them..

Persephone's Garden

Persephone’s Garden: A Tale of the Spring

Long ago, in the time when they believed the Earth was flat, in the far reaches of the Greek world, there lived a small and humble farming family. The two girl children, Athanasia and Zenobia knew there was nothing but fields of wheat as far as the eye could see in most every direction—save one. Off to the west grew a stand of trees near a stream, and tucked away in these trees was a very special place, a place the girls called their Secret Garden.

During the hottest days of the year, when all growth ceased and the days were lazy and long, the girls would dream of the seasons when the garden was in bloom. This garden was the very first place where the flowers would return as well as the last from which they would depart every year.

One such day, after months of heavy heat, the girls’ mother said to them, “Young ones, your chores are done. Go out now and play. There is naught to do in here but sit around and be food for the bugs. Find yourselves a shady spot and dream of the rains.”

Athanasia, the elder of the two at eleven, smiled freely at the suggestion. She beckoned to her sister with a wink, “Come, Zenobia. Let us see if we can find a suitable place to play.”

So off the girls went, following a winding path of their own creation to their most Sacred place, Their Secret Garden. Though there had been no flowers for three months now, the girls were careful always to check for weeds and keep everything in order. They took great pride in their work, but they also guarded their secret fiercely. Their Father, though he meant well, could be a little over protective, and the girls were fearful that he would disallow their trips to the Garden if he ever found out.

Because they were so careful with their treasured knowledge, the girls were very surprised not only to find their Garden blooming, but also to see a woman standing among the dripping rose bushes with a bloom in her hand. Frozen in their tracks, they barely flinched when the woman locked eyes with them and smiled warmly.

“Excuse me,” Athanasia finally spoke. “We did not mean to disturb you.”

“Nonsense,” the woman replied. “You must be the ones who have been caring for my garden in my absence.”

Zenobia frowned in confusion. “Your Garden?” she asked. “How come I have never seen you here before?”

The woman laughed. “I live very far away, but this is one of my most favorite places in all of Hellenismos.”

“Mine, too!” exclaimed Zenobia.

“What are your names, if I may ask?” inquired the lady.

“I’m Zenobia, and I’m five and a half,” Zenobia declared. “And that’s Athanasia. She’s eleven and thinks she’s a grown up.”

The Lady bowed her head slightly and said, “Please to make your acquaintance. My name is Persephone.”

Both girls gaped at her in astonishment. They were simple country children, but not completely unawares of the religion of the Great City, infused as it was in everything they did. But the girls knew the story of Persephone and Hades. Persephone was the Dark Queen of the Underworld, not a beautiful woman in a garden.

“Judging by your stunned silence, I would wager you have at least heard my name before?” Persephone asked.

“But, Persephone is a dark and scary lady who spends her time bossing dead people around. She doesn’t like flowers!” Zenobia blurted out. Athanasia stayed her sister and waited.

Persephone regarded this for a moment before she answered her. “Child, in your many years here with us, have you not lost one whom you loved?” Persephone asked.

Athanasia answered for them both, for not long ago they lost their grandmother, the dearest in their hearts. “Our Grandmother now resides in your world.”

“I see,” said Persephone. “And she was good to you, wasn’t she?”

“O, yes!” Zenobia smiled at her memory. “She made the best cakes and told us stories. She is the one who told us about you.”

“I am glad to hear of it.” Persephone replied walking closer to the children. “Little one, do you think your grandmother, who was wise and kind, would be someplace bad and scary for the rest of eternity?”

“Well, I…” For the first time, Zenobia was unsure what to say.

Athanasia waited, regarding the Goddess carefully as she stood before them. She found her unnerving. More than a little too quickly she said, “Please, we meant no harm. Let us be on our way, and we will not bother your garden again.”

“Athanasia, the point I am making is this:” Persephone began. “I may be Queen of the Underworld for a portion of the year, but I am still the Maiden of the Spring when the rains come and wake the Earth. My mother, Demeter, cries freely tears of joy each year when I am given to her again. But while I am away, and she is lost in her longing, the world turns dry and hot and no flowers will grow. It is during this time that I am down below, not in a dark and scary place, as you describe it, but in a warm and comfortable place where your grandmother has come to make her eternal home. And, where ever I go, the flowers follow…” Persephone pointed to the path she walked to reach the children’s side, and lo, the way was marked with blooms of every color, as the flowers bloomed at her feet.

Amazement covered the girls’ faces. Zenobia’s mouth gaped in awe, and Athanasius’ eyes were wide with wonder. Persephone continued, “This garden is the last place I see before I go to Hades side, and the first place to which I come when I return. This is why the flowers here are the last as well as the first.

“Now, since you have admitted freely it was you who has been tending my garden, I must give you your due,” said Persephone with a wink. “I know a great deal more than you may think about what goes on in my absence.

“I will be going north soon, but there is magic here that you may use to aid your family. Take you these flowers and make wreaths out of them. Then, take them to your Father’s shed. Whatever tools you hang them on will be fruitful in their work upon the Earth. Gaia knows they are my flowers and will bless the tools they have touched. Your father’s garden will grow and grow, and your faithfulness will be rewarded to your entire village.”

Just then, a chariot drawn by two magnificent horses landed from the sky. They paused long enough for Persephone to gracefully climb into the back, and then off they went, up and away, to carry her to her mother’s waiting arms.

Several minutes passed before the girls were able to tear their eyes away from the place where the horses had disappeared into the skyline. Finally, Athanasia returned to herself and regarded Zenobia. “Come, little one, and I will show you how to weave a wreath.”

Together, the girls made a dozen wreaths, growing more anxious and excited as they worked. On their way home, they decided still to keep the gift from the Goddess to themselves, lest it didn’t work, for they did not wish to lose their garden visits for naught.

They continued to tend the garden whenever they could steal away, and over time, they noticed something very peculiar. All of the seeds their father planted had sprung forth, and much sooner than the neighboring fields. As the season waxed, their father’s fields continued to be larger and fuller than all those surrounding them. The neighbors were all in awe over his newly found luck in farming.

Once the harvest arrived, the girls decided to tell their father of what they had done. As the girls spoke, a single tear ran down his face. When the girls were done telling their tale, he quietly asked them to take him to their garden. Once there, he fell to his knees and began to thank the Goddess for her kindness. After some time spent in this manner, he walked slowly around the garden and with an eye more keen to the keeping of growing things, tending the areas in need of further work.

The next year, and every year after that, the family spent much time caring for the gardens and following Persephone’s instructions. And every year the family farm grew larger and larger. Poverty was no longer a familiar word in their neighborhood, and the children grew up healthy and happy.

Persephone was not seen again, but the evidence of her time in the garden was always there for anyone with the eyes to see the path she walked through the garden, for it was always laced with the largest blooms.

Anthesteria Recap

Today, I performed my Anthesteria rite.

It. was. awesome.

Anthesteria this year was in honor of the Ancestors. I made peace with relationships that were toxic in my past, recognized the necessity of the situations and people in my past, and let go of all the hurt and anger that I have been holding on to. I have the Ancestors box since I am DIC for the next rite, and having the Ancestors of my Grove around me and supporting me as I made peace with the not-so-great relationships was very empowering.

I made an offering to the Outdwellers, which is not something I routinely do. I did the rite in my living room, and since this is not an area I usually hallow, I thought it would be wise. It left me feeling very peaceful, and I really needed that feeling going into this!I honored Hestia and the Earth Mother, called to Apollo for inspiration, and Eos opened the gates for me. During the key offerings portion of the rite, I honored the Ancestors with some impromptu words, and then I recognized the Christian gods I worked with and thanked them for the foundation of faith that they helped me to build. I honored them and told them I was moving on.

Omens? Gebo, Othala and Dagaz.

For the return flow, I used a small portion of watered down wine. It definitely made the water feel like more than water (which it was), and I think I may start doing this on a regular basis--especially since I drink water on a regular basis as my beverage of choice.Overall, it was an excellent rite. I didn't leave anything out, and there are no negative feelings or regrets. I do believe I finally have a handle on all this ADF stuff. ;)

Today is a good day. Esto!

Imbolc with the Cranes

Brighid of the Mantle, encompass us… 02/01/2009 Blacklick Woods Metropark The experience of an Imbolc rite with Three Cranes was highly anticipated. Rich in Grove tradition, it has the most attendee participation due to the candle-lighting ceremony. We are blessed to have a Flame Keeper among us, and so the light of Brighid, kindled at Kildare and traveled across the Nine waves, was present at our rite. But the day did not start here. This day was also the Druid moon known as the “Stay at home” moon. Our Grove priest began at our Flame Keeper's home and lit a candle from the Kildare Flame. He then proceeded to visit the homes of all the Grove members who requested it and brought the light of Brighid into our homes. I do believe the grand total of members visited this morning was twenty. Mike had never been to my house, so it was nice for him to get a look at my personal space. There is something special about inviting someone into your home and it helps when they come bearing a gift like, say, the light of a goddess. I spent the morning singing and putting things in order. I had the communal rooms of my home blessed with the light of Brighid, but left my personal shrine space for Hestia. After Mike left, I did a small devotional in which I honored both Goddesses of the Hearth, noting the importance of recognizing the inherent value of the hearth as the sacred center of the family as well as the community at large, and using the belief that all fires are sacred as a means of tying them together. It was a good devotional. I really felt the fire kindle in my chest, and it continued to burn for most of the day. I think they like each other, and I also believe that Hestia was pleased with the way I handled this. The rite itself had a few easily camouflaged “hiccups,” but overall, our offerings were accepted. I did the grove attunement, the traditional Grove Crocus Meditation written by Jenni. Mike did a very powerful Waters of Life (Note to self: write a song to replace “Pour the Waters.”). I also performed “Blessing for Flame Keepers” during the working portion of the rite in which we collected and blessed the cloth to be used in the healing blanket (which is a story for another time). It went well! Overall, it was a very good rite. Liturgically speaking, it was not perfect, but there was an underlying theme of closeness among the grove members. There was a lot of bonding before, during, and after this rite, and I did note that the people drawn to one another were also the ones whose homes were blessed that morning. There are forces at work of which we are not always aware, and the Lady of the Lambs has drawn her children together during this Imbolc season. Omens for this rite include: Have our offerings been accepted? Fern/ The Alder "oracular vision and shielding"... yes! (the interpretation was due in large part to the shielding aspect of this few) What blessings do the kindred have for us in return? Uillend/The Honeysuckle "the core values found at the center of the labyrinth" What further uses do the kindred have of us? Ruis/The Elder "the queen under the mound remind us to let go of that which has outlived its usefulness in order to make room for the new" Taken together these might suggest:"Shielded and with the guidance of the kindred, we stand strong with our core values intact and treasured. We must be ready to surrender that which has outlived its usefulness and be ready for new growth." I find it interesting that since I am DIC-ing the next rite, I brought the Ancestors box home with me. Being a Hellene, my next personal high day rite (Wednesday) is Anthesteria. It is a time for recognizing the forces (kheres) and the dead whom you feel the need to placate for a day. I had already planned on a very Ancestor-oriented rite in which I make amends and peace with the Ancestors of my family with whom my relationships were not the best. In a rite where I confront the Ancestors of Blood, I will be surrounded by the Ancestors of the Grove, my chosen family. The significance of this cannot be put into words. It's just ironic that I, of all people and of all times, have the Ancestors of the Grove with me. The Kindred will provide for you the things that you need to help you along your path. This is just one more way that they are supporting me and solidifying that I have made the right choices thus far on my path.

Finishing the Dedicant Journey, and beginning the next...

What a journey.

These past few months, as I have said several times (kind of ad nauseum), have been amazing. I can't believe the growth that I have seen in myself! And at my age!

I have been asked to create a Hellenic rite for 3CGs Spring Equinox. I have a basic rite that I perform for devotionals with added cowbell for high days that follows the COoR. All I had to do was edit!

Spring Equinox is in honor of Persephone in an obscure holiday called Anthesphoria, or The Festival of the Flowers. Persephone is returning from the Underworld, and similarly to the Country Dionysia, each area celebrated at a local discretion when there were enough flowers to pick and make wreaths to hang on farm equipment and the like, so the Goddess would bless their growing season. Buying flowers for this was considered blasphemous. This is not a highly documented rite. Most information you will find about it is in the history of the Roman Florisertum, or Flower Festival, of which Anthesphoria is a precursor. Also, it was mostly carried out by the women and children and not directly tied to the state. No taxes, no records. You know how it goes.

So, in honor of my lady, Persephone, I wrote a rite with her as the Deity of the Occasion. I will still have to edit when I know what exactly the grove wants to do for the workings portion. They had said something about blessing tools and the like. But now that the main part of the rite is done, we can nit-pick it to death at the next liturgy meeting.

I am very grateful to have a grove that is allowing me to hijack a rite and perform it in a foreign hearth culture. I am part of the grove. I am part of the grove family. I am at home, and asking me to DIC this rite is proof of reciprocity.

Also, this is the last rite I need to cover for my DP. What a way to end the cycle! I began at Beltaine last year as a solitary with no intention of ever joining a grove, and I am ending with Spring Equinox as a full grove member and DIC to boot! It is almost too much, but I actually feel like I am ready. Not like the Yule fiasco *shudders*.

It is humbling to look back at the gifts I have been given on this journey. Since beginning the Dedicant path, the Kindred have given me everything I have asked for. Everything. I will probably weep through my Dedicant Oath (Druid moon in March!) because of it, but I don't care. May my tears be a gift to my gods.

What a journey.

Anthesteria: Preparing for The More Ancient Festival of Apollonius Sophistes (Dionysos)

Fellow Hellenes will not need an explanation of the festival, but for the non-Hellenes, I will begin with a description of the holiday.

In short, this is another festival for Dionysos. The new wine was ready. When the new jars were opened, the smell of the wine (which had not yet been diluted as is their normal practice) would attract the Ghosts of the dead, and they would come and drink. At sundown, the wine was watered down 1:4 with water, and in the morning a day of drinking begins. I mean, everyone drinks. They have important figures involved in drinking competitions to see who can drain their mug first. Similar to the Winter festivals of Dionysos (The Country Dionysia), there are drinking games among the common folk as well. They even had bands of drunken men in the back of carts who would go around shouting obscenities and insults at people and singing lewd songs.

During these three days the Greeks gave offerings and tolerated the presence of the ghosts of the dead, but on the end of the third day, they carry jugs of wine to the edges of the city and kick out the spirits. Kinda like, "Hey, we did our part and gave you stuff, now get out."

Then the wife of the King becomes Ariadne and sleeps with some guy who represents Dionysos.

Yay.

The coolest part is the Tree of Life. They had a tall pole that "grew" out of an omphalos-shaped base wound with ivy . "The Tree of Life Grows from the Navel of the World." hehe...I found the Hellenic World Tree.

The main reason I wanted to visit this festival is because of the focus and variation on the relationship between us and the Ancestors. I understand the importance of honoring the Ancestors, but there is a lot of baggage in my Ancestor's box. The Greeks thought of the dead more like we think of the Outdwellers, and Anthesteria was about honoring/recognizing the roaming spirits (Kheres) for one day and then kicking them out. This more than describes how I feel about my ancestors sometimes. I am moving past this point of view, but some days, I want to yell: "Out, Kheres! It is no longer Anthesteria!"

This year, I am going to let go of the past. I am going to embrace for one day all the hurts that have been inflicted upon me that I just can't get rid of. I will allow them to flow through me and then I will look at how much I have changed and rid myself of the hurt and sorrow and anger that I have been holding for far too long. Due to an inspired blog written by dubhlainn I am also going to be relieving the Oath I took in baptism as a Christian to Isu. I definitely forged a bond with my god as a Christian, just like the bonds I have with my current patrons. I think it is safe to say that I have evolved past and moved on from those promises I made (and I made a lot of promises). I am working through my guilt about being a Oath-breaker, and I think that formally recognizing the contributions that Jesus, The Holy Spirit and Father God made in my life and acknowledging that I am moving forward because of the foundation built at that time will aid me in letting go of a lot of other things. I also know that I cannot make my Dedicant Oath in March until I do this. This is one of the most important Oaths I am ever going to make, and I want to come into it pure of heart and mind with as much of my past clearly put behind me as possible.

I'll let you know how it goes. I know how much this is going to hurt, but sometimes the worst of jobs can also be the most rewarding...