Stage 3: Refusal of the CallChange. It’s a scary word. It invites us to explore the unknown and accept the outcome of our risks. Reluctance to accept our roles or the steps we must take in our first barrier. We doubt our ability to be the change we want to see in our worlds. We minimize our own skills and importance. We hide our strengths and amplify our weaknesses. Past successes feel like minor accomplishments in a world of greater humans. Imposter syndrome rears its ugly head and we sink into Self-doubt, worried someone on the outside of our inner mind-world will see us for the frauds we are.
This is our fear talking. This is the Refusal of the Call. How can we be worthy of such success as these changes will help us to reap? How can we presume we have the skillset to accomplish these goals? The second step on this journey is to recognize and validate the You are Here of our fears—and let them go.
In this light of the third flame, we acknowledge and allow our fears to fade away.
Guided Meditation: Facing your FearsRest for a moment in the light of the third Flame.
Breathe deeply, and allow your eyes to close.
Find yourself once more within your shell, your tiny seed beneath the Earth.
Rest in the comfort of the familiar, even though you know this is not enough life for you.
Feel the shell, hard and uncaring, holding you back, keeping you separate from life.
Isolating, alone, steeping in your innermost thoughts of fear and not-enough-ness.
This feeling, dark and desperate, makes the thought of finding your strength and breaking out of this container to small to hold you almost unbelievable, impossible.
And then you see it within your chest: a tiny pulsing light,
ebbing and flowing with your breath—no, with the beating of your heart.
The Flame of Transformation is inside the shell with you,
It is within you where it has always been, waiting to be seen and put into action.
As you breathe in, see this light expand and shimmer,
As you exhale feel it smolder and continue to burn, warming every part of your being.
Breathe in, and as you exhale, see this flame growing larger, consuming one-by-one
Your fears, your worries, your not-enough-ness.
See left behind the potential you know to be true:
See your skill. See your love. See your strength.
You have within you—and have had all along—the strength to break open your shell.
You only need to embrace the courage to use it.
You can do this. Be your own hero and believe in yourself. You are enough.
As you open your eyes, reflect for a moment on your fears and then set them all aside. Consider a journal entry for your thoughts.